There is a good chance you found us accidentally by using the word “taint” in your search (If you found us on purpose, you deserve our accolades). Of course, we don’t know what you were looking for, but you stumbled on a damn cool project. Look around; let us help send you on a musical journey. Here you will find a number of album reviews from the strange and extreme to the tame and mainstream. Our reviewers are a bunch of obsessive miscreants. Most of us are avid music collectors and have been involved in the music world for decades. A couple of us have been in or are still in bands.
There are no rules on Tickle Your Taint Blog. Our reviewers might make you laugh, or piss you off; both results are legitimate. One reviewer might write a glowing review of an album; another might tear it apart. We may have a new review every week, or we could end up with one every six months. This blog exists as a social experiment to build community among a diverse group of music maniacs – our reviewers and hopefully you.
Careful readers of my previous entries in this series may have noticed that my passion for music is beginning to wane. In 2018, this trend sadly continues. I’ll do my best to get you hyped up about some recent albums that I like, but my apologies in advance if my enthusiasm is a bit constrained compared to the past. Who knows? Maybe I’ll get into the swing of things and come up with some superlatives that I currently have trouble feeling.
(Why? What kind of soulless being gives up on new music? I blame it on that timeworn source of misery called workplace stress, the resulting depression, and the previously unforeseen need to perhaps make a sudden and shocking career change. But let’s escape that world for a moment, shall we?)
Swingin’ Utters, Peace and Love(2018).
Who can predict which bands will have the greatest longevity? I always assume that punk bands will flame out in some small or large way after a short time, either due to internal/external strife or just running out of interesting things to say. Swingin’ Utters is the exception—they’re still putting out new (and, more importantly, high quality!) stuff almost thirty years after they formed. My first record of theirs that I purchased was the Scared10” back in 1992 or 1993, which was a Holstein-colored slab of medium-sized vinyl. It may have been my first vinyl album that wasn’t solid black, but I’m probably misremembering. I enjoyed them then, and I enjoy them now. I saw them play live in 2007 and was absolutely floored by their set. I was dancing and singing along as if I were twenty-one again. I’d love to see them play live at least once more, but no one ever comes to Frozen City.
What’s that? I should talk about the current album? It’s solid punk rock, my friend! Johnny’s voice has not changed in the entire existence of the band. They seemed to have dropped the folky/Irish stuff for this offering—since I am a simple man, I’m glad they made this decision. The fourth song, “E.C.T.,” appears to be a Ramones tribute—I approve. They also have an anti-Trump song called “Yes I Hope He Dies.” Since I’m a living being, it goes without saying that I appreciate the sentiment! If you like punk rock, do yourself a favor and pick up this album. You’ll note that, unfortunately, it’s the only punk rock from 2018 that is on my list this year.
The Night Flight Orchestra, Sometimes the World Ain’t Enough(2018).
I learned of this album’s existence in the last month of this year. I love it! I think you’ll either agree with me or hate this. Hard to imagine a lukewarm reception for this music. NFO is made up of a bunch of Swedish death metal dudes who play straight 1980s cheese. If you’re of a similar age to me, this will remind you of being a kid. If this album had come out in, say, 1983, it would have been platinum. Imagine a mash-up of bands like Journey, Foreigner, Survivor, “Sleeping Bag” era ZZ Top, etc. with the Beverly Hills Copsoundtrack and a dash of Miami Vicefashion sensibility. That will get you in the neighborhood. Pure nostalgia done right. If you hate this kind of replication on principle, I understand, but this album is high-energy stuff with no filler and a metric ton (tonne?) of hooks. More hooks than a pastel-and-neon pirate ship bound for Miami! My top album of the year, for sure. Favorite songs: hard to pick, but I’ll go with “Moments of Thunder,” “Speedwagon,” “Turn to Miami,” and “Barcelona.” Here’s a video:
Judas Priest, Firepower(2018).
Their best album since Rob rejoined the band well over a decade ago. That’s a pretty low bar, though—who can forget the colossal mistake that was Nostradamus? Thankfully, Firepowerclears the aforementioned bar with the ease of an Olympic pole vaulter. They may want to think about changing their name soon, now that Downing and Tipton are no longer providing their patented dual-guitar assault for the band. Also, fuck Parkinson’s Disease.
Visigoth, Conquerer’s Oath(2018).
I had been eagerly anticipating this set of songs from Visigoth for a long time. Their first album,The Revenant King(2015), is easily my favorite metal record of the new millennium. I enjoy the hell out of their newest effort, but it’s not quite at the same level as their first. It appears that most of the internet disagrees with me, as multiple reviews I’ve read contend that Conquerer’s Oathis the superior album. You should buy both and make the determination for yourself. Check out this video for “Warrior Queen”—I had no idea that a human body could contain that much blood!
Blade Killer, High Risk(2018).
A sonic homage to the NWOBHM heroes of eons past. I quite like it. The singer sounds like Paul Di’Anno! They’re going for a bit of early Maiden, but I’m also picking up some Jaguar, Blitzkrieg, and some of the other bands from the heavier end of NWOBHM. Watch out—they’ve got blades! Maybe they’re “blade killers” because their beard stubble is so thick that it wears out their razors quickly. Sorry, I shouldn’t make fun. Coming up with a good band name at this late date is damned hard. Theirs is fine, as is their music.
TV Smith, Land of the Overdose(2018).
The punk rock troubadour returns! Even if this sounded like crap—far from it, by the way—TV Smith deserves our admiration for keeping the spirit of revolution in music alive for over 40 years now. I wish he’d tour the United States—he’s one of the few performers I’d travel to see! I hope he keeps on playing music for the next twenty years. Unless he wants to retire—he’d be about eighty by then.
High Priestess, High Priestess(2018).
I bought this CD on a whim a few months back. An all-female psych doom band can be a lot of fun. This Los Angeles band is certainly that. While the charm wears away with repeated listens, it’s an agreeable representative of its genre.
Lucifer, Lucifer II(2018).
I don’t have much time for music like this anymore (i.e., retro 1970s doomy stoner Sabbathy stuff—I used to eat this up with a spoon a few years back, but it all sounds the same now), but this band does it as well as anyone else around. Johanna’s voice is superb. The songs are catchy enough. If you like this genre, you’ll love this band.
Satan, Cruel Magic(2018).
I will save my words for an eventual co-review with Jimmy B.
Outline, Fire Whiplash(2018).
Speed metal with a female singer! It’s fine! It probably won’t be a cornerstone of your record collection, but that is just an unrealistic expectation for anything you listen to. If it happens—fucking great! You won the lottery! If not, at least you probably enjoyed the music for a while, as I did with Outline’s album.
Haunt, Burst into Flame(2018).
This is another of those releases that I found only a couple of weeks before writing. So far, I like it quite a bit. Old-school melodic heavy metal straight out of the NW of the NWOBHM. I guess it’s called the New Wave of Traditional Heavy Metal. I’ll always give a band a chance if they’re playing music from my favorite metal genre (i.e., traditional metal). Vocals are sung, not shouted or growled (as it should be). In their promo picture, one of the band members is wearing an Angel Witch shirt. This should give you a good idea of what they sound like. (If you don’t know Angel Witch, for shame!) (Also in the promo picture, one of the members is wearing a Haunt shirt. I don’t know about you, but I hatethis. Bands, please don’t wear you own band’s shirt, for fuck’s sake!)
Throne of Iron, 2018 Demo(2018).
“Come with me and roll the dice.” This is some fine 1980s style sword and sorcery metal. You should listen to this while playing the first edition of Advanced D & D. (The subsequent editions don’t have the same metal aesthetic.) Sounds like they’ve listened to a lot of Judas Priest, Omen, and Manilla Road. I wouldn’t say they ripped off “The Hellion/Electric Eye” in the intro to their first song, but they certainly found some inspiration from the Priest classic. There are only three songs—I look forward to seeing what they’ll do next! They receive negative points for their Bandcamp photo, where all three members are drinking cans of Coors. All is forgiven (and then some!) due to the RPG maps on the wood-paneled basement wall, the plaid couch with wood accents, and the two visible sword hilts. It looks like my teenage bedroom, minus the swords. I was too poor for such things. And the Coors—I was poison free until I was well into my college years.
Black Death, Black Death(1984/2017).
Hell’s Headbangers reissued this album recently. Black Death was the first all-African American metal band. As an album, it’s decent, but the first song “Night of the Living Death” is worth the price of admission by itself. It’s an excellent metal anthem that I’m sure featured on many metal mixtapes back in the day. The singer Siki Spacek (!) screams for all he’s worth. An over-the-top metal masterpiece. The rest of the album can’t hope to hold up to the standard that this song establishes.
Journey, Greatest Hits(2006).
If you need me to describe Journey for you, you’re visiting the wrong site, my friend. Either that or you successfully dodged the radio in the late seventies and eighties. Congratulations! Congratulations? Shit. I’m a fan of good time rock ‘n’ roll from this period—sometimes nothing sounds better on a warm June afternoon (or any other time) than Boston or 38 Special or…Journey. Enjoy this with your head held high. I will do the same.
Podcasts:
The Guardian Football Weekly.
I re-discovered a love for soccer this year, thanks to the World Cup. I watch English Premier League games most weekends (and I’m the proud owner of a Troy Deeney mug! Go Watford!). These fellows have some excellent and humorous analysis of the goings-on in European soccer, with a particular emphasis (of course) on the English Premier League. Capitalism tarnishes and diminishes, if not outright destroys, everything it touches. Soccer is no different, especially in the big European leagues. While Max and Barry probably aren’t socialists (although one or two of their guests have been, and Barry is not a million miles away), they aren’t afraid to take on the caustic billionaires who “own” teams. They also seem to dislike Manchester United, which is a great bonus.
Did you know that Elton John is the honorary life president of Watford FC? There’s a music connection for you.
Behind the News with Doug Henwood.
Doug’s a great analyst of current affairs, even if he doesn’t have a clue about ecological matters. He consistently has guests who know what they’re talking about. My favorite episode from the past year was an October edition that featured the sociologist Shamus Khan, who has done some research on elite prep schools. He came on to talk about how his research relates to that privileged pile of vacuity Brett Kavanaugh (who is such a loathsome creature that my normally politically apathetic students despise him).
Live Music:
Haha. I didn’t attend a single live concert this year! All of you will be pleased to know, however, that my brother and I have solid plans to see IRON MAIDEN in September. In Portland! All Taint Ticklers—I call upon you to unite in PDX this September! Together we will up the irons!
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