About Us


There is a good chance you found us accidentally by using the word “taint” in your search (If you found us on purpose, you deserve our accolades). Of course, we don’t know what you were looking for, but you stumbled on a damn cool project. Look around; let us help send you on a musical journey. Here you will find a number of album reviews from the strange and extreme to the tame and mainstream. Our reviewers are a bunch of obsessive miscreants. Most of us are avid music collectors and have been involved in the music world for decades. A couple of us have been in or are still in bands.

There are no rules on Tickle Your Taint Blog. Our reviewers might make you laugh, or piss you off; both results are legitimate. One reviewer might write a glowing review of an album; another might tear it apart. We may have a new review every week, or we could end up with one every six months. This blog exists as a social experiment to build community among a diverse group of music maniacs – our reviewers and hopefully you.


Tuesday, March 24, 2020

Golf Dolls, Die Trying (Upper Midwest Jr. Art Assassins, 2020)



Reviewed by Null
Golf Dolls are DIY punk band from Madison, Wisconsin. Now, when I say “punk,” I don’t mean the homogenized, over-produced commercial punk that we get shoved down our throats these days, nor do I mean hardcore punk like Minor Threat, whom I love. Instead, the Golf Dolls remind me of the golden age of punk in the 1980s. They sound a bit more like mid-tempo Dead Kennedys, Doc Corbin Dart, The Wipers, or even The Buzzcocks with a little Devo thrown in minus the electronics. This album could have easily appeared in a 1984 Alternative Tentacles catalog. Trying to describe music is hard.
However, I will tell you this: from the moment I put this record on, I was bathing in the glorious sounds of killer riffs, super-catchy melodies, and lyrics that are filled with social critique wrapped in satire, humor, and unapologetic good time fun. It is rare to love an album on first listen, but these guys are so talented and this album is so good that I wanted to get naked and rub it all over my body. I was blown away. If any of this sounds good to you, then don’t hesitate and pick it up at:   
It is available in both digital and CD formats. I suggest getting the CD, as the art work is very reminiscent of classic Winston-Smith. Besides, music downloads suck.

Sunday, March 1, 2020

Love Letter: Veil of Maya, The Common Man’s Collapse (2008)


By Jack Rafferty

While I am currently fine-tuning the daunting task of writing a love letter to my favorite metal album of all time, which will be finished in the good time it takes to do it justice, I thought I’d take the opportunity to write a shorter love letter to another metal album that is dear to my heart, Veil of Maya’s The Common Man’s Collapse. 

No other album sounds like this. Veil of Maya crafted such a wonderful niche for themselves during the height of deathcore. While many other bands of the same genre at the time were trending in the direction of “who can down-tune their seven-string lower and chug riffs slower,” Veil of Maya took the refreshing approach of using a standard-tuned six-string guitar, with the odd twist of a seven-string bass. In addition to this, Veil of Maya leaned more heavily toward melody in their riffs, driven by a highly rhythmic, percussive sound. They keep brutality in the vocals, which establishes a satisfying contrast to the central melody, and steers Veil of Maya away from the tediousness of an overtly heavy genre becoming oversaturated with elements that negate its identity. 

Perhaps Veil of Maya’s greatest strength is the tightness of the execution of their playing, coupled with the sharpness of the production. Every sound is brilliantly distinct and fresh in the mix, which is a feat when considering they still manage to be heavy as fuck. Another very important factor to note is the magnificent talent of guitarist Marc Okubo. Apart from mere technical proficiency, some of the reaches in chords and note progression that Marc is able to accomplish is reminiscent of Hendrix at times in the seeming impossibility of it. 

All of this would be for nothing if the songwriting was shit. Luckily for us this is not the case. I’ve always found the pacing of Veil of Maya songs in particular to be excellent. You always felt carried along in a very unpredictable, yet simultaneously logical sequence of shifts throughout each song. Never knowing where you’re going, but fully knowing that it will be a place you like. 

Another important aspect is their ability to cultivate character in each track. I never have trouble with mixing up Veil of Maya songs, because each song breathes its own life, while never straying too far from a central sound enveloping the album in its entirety. 

Most importantly, though, Veil of Maya is just fucking fun. Their music is fun. It is high-energy, heavy, melodic, groovy, and always makes me want to either throw down or dance. I struggle to even pick three, let alone one, track to highlight, as all of them truly maintain an exceptional level of quality. All of this with the neat bow of a thirty-three-minute run time on top. So many bands these days that play at this speed overwhelm the shit out of their audience by being ignorant to, or willfully neglecting the fact, that less is more. You never want to give too much of a good thing that overstays its welcome. Bell Witch can pull off a song that is an hour and a half because the style and atmosphere of their music allows for it. But bands that don’t have sonic styles justifying such length need to be smarter about how they convey their work. Understand the medium through which you express art, damn it; Veil of Maya does.

All right, enough rambling. I would do Veil of Maya a disservice to end this love letter on such a note. So, in conclusion, The Common Man’s Collapse is an extremely well done, mature, blood-pumping album, made all the more impressive that it was the band’s debut. I have spent many hours of my life moving my spindly anatomy to it, and will continue to do so for many more.